Creating an Emotional Connection

I began writing at a very young age - mostly in the form of journal entries or short stories. My writing was often based on an emotional experience or feeling. I've always been a very emotional person. I think that many people would see me as being too emotional. I wrote about my emotions for various reasons:
   * to analyze my feelings.
   * to document an event or happening in my life & the effect it had on me
   * to remember how the emotions felt & affected my actions
   * to learn from what I experienced

But, often I wrote about

Thinking Though Your Fingers

Since a very young age, writing has been my first choice for recording & communicating my memories & feelings. For a big part of my childhood, I felt as though I had no voice. I recorded things down in a dime store diary with, what I thought, was a very safe lock clasp closure. The diary was hidden between my mattress and the box springs -- where no one would think to look. The key to my diary was on the floor behind the foot of the bed -- where I could reach it when laying in bed at night. I filled the pages of one diary, purchased another diary, filled those pages, and a love of writing was born. 

Seriously... Hide the Fact that I'm Messed Up?

I've had more than a few people ask me recently if I want to be "so honest" in this blog.  And, when I really think about it, the answer is "Of course not!"  But, I've chosen to approach this blog (and a huge part of my life at this point) with openness and honesty.  I admit, there are still chapters in my life which I have not chosen to make public. Perhaps those chapters will be released at a later date :) I've make a huge effort to share only MY story - not that of others.  I believe that EVEN when someone else's story has a huge impact on your life, it's not your story to share.

I've been journaling off & on since I was a little girl.  When I was in 1st or 2nd grade, my parents bought me a little diary with a lock on the side.  I kept the diary under my pillow.  I kept the key on the stand beside my bed hidden under a doily my grandmother had made. And, I am not ashamed to tell you that I penned some powerful notes in the days of pig-tails & puppy dogs!  Many of them were about that cute neighbor boy who never seemed to notice me.  Some were about wishing my dad wasn't the preacher but, my friend's dad - a farmer with 3 horses, chickens, cows, goats, fields & woods. Some notes chronicled the amount of strawberries my best friend & I ate while sitting on the dirt in her father's strawberry field - the same field that grew cotton on other years. Other notes talked of wishing I had a Palomino pony who'd take me to school each morning instead of me having to walk or a little monkey who stayed in my room but went to the bathroom outside so my mom wouldn't be upset!

Some of my current entries have been pulled from diaries, journals, notes to dear friends, etc.  But, regardless of when or where they were written, I intend them to be open & honest as I share them.  I want them to communicate that my life looks perfect from some angles & looks like burning rubble from others. My life is no different than anyone else's life -- in the fact that what is seen on the outside doesn't always portray what is happening on the inside.

If you've read anything I've written, you can see that the ONE thing that makes sense of all my craziness... the up's & down's... the seen & unseen... is my relationship with God & my love for Him. I am not & have never been a "perfect Christian."  I've made the choice to wake up each morning & try to honor Him to the best of my abilities that day! If I leave nothing else in this world, I pray that I leave the HOPE for others to know that God makes the difference... only God...  no matter how messed up you are!

"For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength."

Philippians 4:13

My Life in Tweets (and Thoughts)

Thanks to T. Getz for this photo & scripture.  In the twists & turns of life, whether good or bad, those who claim the name of "Christ-follower" can know that God will work GOOD out of anything & everything, if we trust Him to do so.

Since I started doing Twitter over 2 years ago, I seem to think in about 140-character thoughts.  Here's My Life in Tweets (and Thoughts) for the past month or so.  I seem to "tweet" a lot!

05/09/11... Dear God, Help me forgive those who see & do nothing. Give me peace that through You I have seen & done all I can. It's in Your hands.

05/09/11... Each day brings new heartaches & new joys. It's great to know that God is never caught by surprise & has a plan! Jeremiah 29:11

05/09/11... Everyone's story is their own to tell -- even when it deeply affects "me" and/or the lives of those around. You never know what someone is going through. Be slow to judge & quick to love.


05/07/11... "Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. " 1 Corinthians 13:7


05/07/11... No matter how hard you try to get someone to love you back, you can't MAKE them. That doesn't mean you shouldn't still love them. ( This entire chapter is worth reading! 1 Corinthians 13)


05/05/11... Ever see one of your friends and think, "Oh my! She's aged about 15 years!!!"?Well, I'm gonna be that friend next time you see me.


05/05/11... It's not every day that you hear the hubby ask, "Wanna go shoot the Glock out behind the pine trees, Honey?"


05/04/11... What a great comfort we have in God's Word... "When the cares of my heart are many, your consolations cheer my soul." Psalm 94:19  #GodWins


05/04/11... Looks like our son will be a busy boy at UofCinci, College-Conservatory of Music this fall - Double Major Trombone Performance & Composition.


05/04/11... "Dear James, Great news!!! You have been moved off the composition waitlist to accept! We’ll get an official letter out to you later this week. CCM"


05/03/11... Just in time for Mother's Day - "IN THA MUTHAHOOD" - where my muthas at? Laugh and RT! http://bit.ly/mm9BKm "I'm a Momma Bear & all the Mommas agree, If you messin' with my kids, you straight up messin' with me!" - love those words from the video!


05/03/11 3:44am... @kimberlymajeski For some reason I was awakened abruptly at 3:44 am. So, I'm part of the "night shift" & praying for Rose, you & the family!


05/02/11... If I could speak all the languages of earth and of angels, but didn’t love others, I would only be a noisy gong… http://bible.us/1Cor13.1.NLT


05/02/11... I'm losing myself in my work today... being reminded gently in my spirit that someone BIGGER is dealing with the yuck for me.


04/30/11... Might need to go move a few things so my MPCWomMinLeadTeam girlfriends can safely walk thru the house tomorrow 6-9pm WOOHOOO... party!


04/29/11... "For now we see in a mirror, dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part, but then I shall know just as I also am known." 1 Corinthians 13:12


04/29/11... KISS HER... KISS HER... KISS HER... KISS HER... KISS HER... KISS HER... KISS HER... KISS HER... KISS HER... KISS HER... KISS! #TheRoyalKiss


04/29/11... I am being SUCH A GEEK about this Royal Wedding!!! I can do without some of the press comments. I just wanna see the pretty stuff :D


04/29/11... History in the making right before our eyes. May they remember & reflect upon the Word which was spoken in their ceremony. God be praised!!


04/29/11... I love when weddings are "church" -- bringing honor, glory & praise to God. And, I love words from God's Holy Word put to music!!! #blessed


04/28/11... "Fight your battles on your knees. No one knows the whole story better than God." ~ C.Stanley    ".. the Spirit himself intercedes for us.." Romans 8:26


04/28/11... I'm pretty sure we broke a world record at getting in & out of Bonge's... which is fine for tonight. Idol on TV & working on our laptops :)


04/28/11... I don't want to cook... I just want to go out or eat chocolate... I'm in a working mood


04/28/11... I truly hate SQUARE cars... seeing them makes me feel angry. They look like a box on wheels.


04/28/11... Does somebody know anyone who would deliver some raspberry filled & vanilla creme filled donuts ASAP? PLEASE and THANK YOU :D


04/27/11... Today is Administrative/Executive Assistant's Day & I got to be a recipient thanks to my part-time, temporary job at MPC. THANKS FRIENDS :D


04/27/11... There's just something about being a mom that melts your heart when you see other moms with their kids... even when the kids are grown up :)


04/26/11... I hate it when I'm in a hurry and accidentally RT myself... but, I can only be social to a small degree when working!


04/26/11... There was a boy, a very strange, enchanted boy... they say he wandered very far, very far over land & sea.... background to work... REALLY?


04/26/11... The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return. So,if you can can can... open your heart to love :)


04/26/11... The car our daughter drives, the "Teal-Mobile," died on the road on Good Friday night. It didn't rise on Easter morning though! #MomChaffeurNow


04/25/11... #tragicmoviedeaths Kevin Costner in The Guardian & in Message in a Bottle. Come to think of it, Kevin Costner anytime/anywhere #Hottie


04/25/11... The LORD is my shepherd; I have all that I need. He lets me rest in green meadows; he leads me beside peacefu… (cont) http://deck.ly/~eOjAg


04/25/11... @xxxeleni Text message me if you can't sleep... i'll tell you a story & bore you to sleep! You know how we old people can be!!


04/25/11... Hanging w/my "gang members" tonight - The Riverwood Gang. Love our small group ministry at @MadisonParkCh


04/22/11... TODAY 4-9pm Journey to the Cross: Huge Easter cross set in Main Auditorium-freestanding, towering, sobering, thoughtful - at @MadisonParkCh


04/22/11... I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrow… http://bible.us/John16.33.NLT


04/21/11... 1 of our son's "homework friends" has been here for almost 6 hrs. He's gotten an after-school snack & dinner. Wonder if I should make up a bed??


04/21/11... I am OVERWHELMED with ALL THE GREAT THINGS TO DO TODAY... Dear God, Please set my schedule today! Love you, Your Little Girl :D


04/21/11... RT @nolyon: Nyquill is a miracle drug. I just wake up feeling refreshed after using it! // What HE said!


04/20/11... When we put on a facade & pretend to be perfect, we're not being real & we rob God. In admitting our weaknesses, God CAN be strong thru us!


04/20/11... i might have stolen @KevinMajeski 's tweet verbatim earlier. As I've said before & will surely say again, it's not my fault he's brilliant!!


04/19/11... I'm struggling here people! There's nothing wrong with talking with a Christian counselor :) #RealLifeTweets


04/19/11... Why YES, I always dress up when I'm going to get my head examined :) http://twitpic.com/4muvoz


04/19/11... Time to head out to "Real Life"... actually, my life HERE is totally REAL... I just don't have to put on make-up for life here :D


04/19/11... It's a cool, gray, rainy day here in central Indiana. Started the day with oatmeal at the breakfast table with both kids. Perfect start!!!


04/18/11... After school snack on the patio swing with my little boy - 6' tall, 18yo, heading to college in the fall little boy. Love my kids :D


04/18/11... Dear God, Please help my attitude to be more like yours today. Somebody is really getting on my nerves. Thank you & Love, Your Child


04/18/11... For me, there's a sense of excitement in the air... a new beginning following rest & renewal... my favorite time of year HOLY WEEK!


04/17/11... Plan B: We'll be having pigs n a blanket instead of hot dogs roasted over the fire. We forgot to buy buns. S'mores-we remembered everything! THEN: PlanB evening-Someone fixed the last boxed mac n cheese--made homemade. Set table for those home, daughter showed up-set another place :) THEN: Bonfire & s'mores w/just a minor Plan B. Our son bought GIANT Hershey bars - LOL. Oh well... overall, an entertaining dinner & evening.


04/17/11... 2.5 hrs cleaning up sticks & left over plant debris on a cool, sunny day is a good thing - right @KelliBays #WeBeFarmGirls :)


04/17/11... So much on my heart today... but not the words to articulate. Good music on & projects inside the house and outside do not require words.


04/15/11... Yes folks, I feel like a worn out toy that the dogs have been fighting over for YEARS! But, I'm going to http://on.fb.me/MusicOfBigBands


04/15/11... Well, apparently the doctor is scared of me & wants me to skip him & go get drugs at the pharmacy. First time out of the house since Sunday


04/13/11... "Sometimes we do everything right & we still lose." My thoughts, keep doing what you believe to be right. That's all the control you have.


04/13/11... Whatever hits the fan will not be distributed evenly.


04/13/11... I'm 100% positive I'm gonna die! I'm just trusting that it won't be due to this sore throat, cold, fever thing that's going on now.


04/12/11... If you are a child of God & you marry a child of the Devil, you're going to have trouble with your father-in-law. #maxonlife


04/12/11... Pretty sure i'm water-logged! The allergy med's i'm taking require me to drink LOTS of water, which requires me to take LOTS of breaks!


04/12/11... I was in a TOTAL PANIC trying to get ready for a wk's vacation-including a cruise-in less than 4 days but, I rolled w/it & had a GREAT TIME!


04/11/11... Scripture I taught the kids when they were very young-I have hidden Your Word in my heart O Lord, that I might not sin against You. Psalm 119:11


04/11/11... I'm making myself work but, I feel ROTTEN! Good thing I love my "job" incorporating my spiritual gift of "communication aka social media" :D


04/10/11... I like to keep money that I find lying around the house.


04/10/11... Hooray! My middle of the night driving shift is over -- hooray!! Driving from 2:15am to 7:45am can be bad for a girl's waistline!


04/09/11... High of 85 projected today in New Smyrna Beach & S-U-N-N-Y. I don't wanna go home to Indiana yet! Heading out later today for a 17-hr drive
 
CRUISE :)


04/05/11... Admitting your mistakes, poor choices, shortcomings, etc. is tough for everyone, I'd suspect. But, it sure does make us all more REAL!


04/05/11... You know you're on a cruise when: 100 waiters from every country in the world EXCEPT the US are dancin & singing along to APPLE BOTTOM JEANS


04/05/11... ... just sitting in bed on my laptop... in my cushy Carnival robe... having coffee & fruit that my HUBBY brought to me :D KEY WEST today!!


04/04/11... This is the jankiest lifeboat drill I've ever done. This is my 11th cruise & 1st without lifejackets!


04/04/11... When you pray, it's best to be specific! We are so grateful that God provided a van for our drive. We just forgot to mention functional AC!!


04/02/11... Guest: "Oh, i see, Burt's changing his socks."  My husband to said "Guest", "Did you just call me Burt?" I'm so glad we brought Layke along to entertain!


04/01/11... Mini-van to borrow (check) Person to feed the cat (check) God’s still working on: House-sitter, Safe Trip, Good family time -- trusting!


04/01/11... A few SURE things for those who walk w/the Lord: He will provide for ALL our needs. Sometimes we won't agree with His methods of providing.


04/01/11... I have a million things to do... why am i lying down now? Oh, I know... my nails need time to completely dry. A girl has her priorities!!!